Smile Through It II: The Next Chapter

Chasing dreams, because I can

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Not entirely successful…

Posted by Oli on Monday 18th December, 2006

The meal was nice – and everyone enjoyed it (including me) – but it was WAY too much physical activity cooking it and I left myself feeling really quite rubbish.

K cooked the starter and the pudding, I did the main, and it was clearly not a cleverly thought out plan.  What I should have done was chosen something that needed preparation and slow cooking in the oven so I wasn’t standing over the stove for half-an-hour odd while it cooked, but could have sat and rested.  More fool me.

It was a lovely dinner and it was great to sit around with the whole family and just eat and chat (pretty much what my family does best).  By the end of the meal, though, I was shattered and my chest was really tight, so I took myself straight up to lie down on the bed.  I thought it would just be for a little while and I’d be back down, but in the end I was settled there for the night.

Today’s been another pretty rough day, paying the price for the over-exertion yesterday.  I’ve been pretty low all day, just feeling a bit pissed off with the seemingly endless merry-go-round of exertion and recovery.  I know it’s what I should be used to by now, but it still grates that I can’t do things two days in a row or if I over-stretch myself it takes me days to recover.

Still, I’ve been trying hard not to be too gloomy about it all and had fun this evening playing a game with my bro, Dad and K.  I won, which is rare for me, but still managed to prove myself stupider(!) than the rest of the family by trying to play at being banker.  I should really know that maths isn’t my strong point and if I want to avoid getting annoyed with myself should give up the job at the start not try to bluff my way through it again and again.

I can see, reading what I’m writing just now, that the sunny-side of my disposition is struggling to get through;I’m taking everything to heart and being downcast about pretty much whatever’s going on today.  It’s just a bad day, though, and everyone has those. 

Doubtless I’ll hit the sack tonight and get a good night’s sleep (I feel exhausted) and things will look much brighter and sunnier in the morning.  These feelings never last forever, it’s just a matter of buckling down, acknowledging the rubbishness and ploughing through it to tomorrow.

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4 Responses to “Not entirely successful…”

  1. Jac said

    I can understand the frustration of a seemingly simple task (e.g cooking) getting the better of you. I suppose it’s a case of testing these things out and then knowing for next time how you could make it easier. You already mentioned the preparing in advance. I always do this if I’m having friends round for dinner, as there is no enjoyment in their company when you are utterly exhausted. My other trick is having my mum round to tidy my house and cook the meal before they arrive 😉 Thats a bit of a cheat though!!

    I’m sure you will find a happy medium suited to your own situation. Remember however for every bad day, there is always a better one to make up for it. I hope today is a better one.

    Jac 🙂

  2. Ben said

    Most importantly though….

    What did you guys eat?!

    Ben x

  3. Frizzymum said

    Don’t be so hard on yourself hunny! I suspect that at least some of your bad mood is down to the fact that you’re such a perfectionist and wanted an absolutely perfect evening. In fact you sound as though you pulled off a superb meal and even threw in a family game for good measure!

    I’ve had far more disasterous dinner parties than that in the past and I don’t have to deal with anywhere near as much crap as you do! So cut yourself some slack.

    Listen to your Aunty Frizz – you know she makes sense!

  4. Emily said

    Now here comes miss annoying “have to find a sunny side to everything” Em to really vex you 😉
    You know I think the reason it winds you up is because you have so much determination and drive. And I know that doesn’t make it any less frustrating, but it is that determination and drive which guarantee you will make the most of your life and live it to its full potential, whatever hurdle you face. You will adapt over time, and get less frustrated, but you will never ever lose your spark Mr L, that spark which creates the frustration when you cant do things but also means you never stop trying and makes you sparkle. (sparkle isn’t very manly is it?! Scrap that, think of something butch ;)) None of the above makes any sense but I know what I mean and am going to post this anyway.
    Oh and you are perfectly entitled to feel down and fed up with the world, nobody can be cheery all the time. x

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